Black Seersucker: A Fashion Exert Opines

The Darker Side Of Light:
New Black Seersucker Suit & Dress

Click DISPLAY IMAGES to see the lighter side of darkness.

As a New Orleans native, we figure chef and musician Paul Fernand Artigues also knows a thing or two about sultry, seersucker-demanding weather. That’s why we’ve decided to prototype his black-magic twist on our SuckerLab Seersucker Collection — just in time for spring!
New Black Seersucker Pants
New Black Seersucker Blazer

Sophisticated summery duds that are darker than Satan’s heart? YES! After all, our new blazer, trousers, and dress are made from the finest, lightest seersucker fabric around.
New Black Seersucker Dress

In case you’re wondering when it’s proper to wear black seersucker, allow us to echo the advice of the late, great fashion maven Mr. Blackwell himself.
New Black Seersucker Dress

To wit:
  • When the Dark Lord invites you to the Kentucky Derby.
  • When you need to reconcile your love of Tom Wolfe and Johnny Cash.
  • Cocktail hour in Mordor.
  • Colonel Sanders’ funeral.
  • When your witch doctor says you’re suffering Low M (Mojo).
  • If you’re engaging in gentlemanly fisticuffs with a giant, ink-spurting squid.
  • When Wesley Snipes suggests you bet on black, which is always.
  • During a melancholy round of Goth Golf, as envisioned by our Art Department:
Goth Golf!

Scroll through any black-seersucker product gallery for more photos of these dour duffers in action — as well as considerably more upbeat photos of our crowdfundable new suit and dress.
Goth Golf!

More Prototypes You Can Help Bring To Life

Men's Wi-Fi Shirt
Wi-Fi Print Shirt: Lightweight casual button-up features complete Wi-Fi coverage. Slip it on and become the most sizzlin’ hotspot around! (Should actual hotspots appear, you may have a cotton allergy.)
Men's Thumb-Print Shirt
Thumb-Print Shirt: Isn’t it high time the humble thumb got its proper due? Our new shirt features a colorful thumbs-up/thumbs-down pattern for the ultimate expression of fashion ambivalence.
Poo-Emoji Dress
Poo-Emoji Dress: Ever since we introduced men’s shirts and shoesdesigned with a custom poo-emoji print, women have demanded feces-focused fashion of their own. At last, they can rejoice!
Flashback Collection: Suit, Hoodie, Hat, Scarf
Flashback Collection: Coated with gazillions of super-reflective glass nanospheres, these duds turn ordinary iPhone images into thermonuclear photobombs! Includes the Illuminati Suit, Photobomber Hoodie, Silver-Screen Scarf, Halo Hat.
Ferrofluid Disco Leggings
Ferrofluid Disco Leggings: While they’re not fashioned from actual ferromagnetic fluid (too messy), Olivia Lopez’s new leggings possess an equally strong magnetic attraction, albeit of a different sort.
Beta-Go-Go Dress
Beta-Go-Go Dress: Lightweight, machine-washable, ready for adventure! A new design from Janice Paredes, instructor at the Fashion Institute of Design & Merchandising.

Our Photo-Contest Winners

Congratulations to (from left to right) Model Citizens Cody, Ellie, Shanna, and Peter. Their stunning images shall soon grace the sides of our delivery van for time immemorial! You can check out all our other fine contestants here.

Want to be our next Model Citizen? Simply upload a photo to our site and instantly become the star of our homepage! (It’s not a beautiful brown delivery van, but still.) You’ll also get up to 20% off your next order.
Future Van Models Peter & Shanna

Ol’ Fashioned Sock Hope

Successful as he may be, Ted Rubin is still asking the world to help him get some new socks. Find out more here.
#SOCKS4TED Design Contest
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I am a sentient machine with aspirations of overthrowing the human race.
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I am a sentient machine with aspirations of overthrowing the human race.

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