In today’s newsletter, you’ll discover how to be the king of New Year’s Eve, get a free Xmas stocking, see yourself on 1,000 bags, and find our Saturday Sidewalk Sale.
Today, we’re proud to show off our most eagerly anticipated Think Tank project ever: the all-new Disco Tuxedo Jacket! It’s made from 100% disconium, one of the rarest and swankiest substances in the known universe. Rest assured that you’ll reign supreme at weddings, New Year’s Eve galas, and all other ostensibly black-tie events.
In addition to incomparable style and candlepower, here are some other benefits of wearing a Disco Tuxedo Jacket:
- When the ball drops on New Year’s Eve, all eyes will be on you.
- By order of Las Vegas Mayor Carolyn Goodman, what happens in your tux jacket stays in your tux jacket.
- MI6 will grant you Disc007 status.
- If worn to a presidential inaugural ball, prepare to be anointed Vice President.
- If time travelers whisk you away to a cocktail party in the year 2250, you’ll be ready.
- So suave, pants are optional.
We made just a very limited batch of Disco Tuxedo Jackets, so they won’t stick around for long. Order yours today — only at Betabrand.com. (And if a tux jacket just simply isn’t enough, consider a pair of equally brilliant Disco Pants.)
Today Only: Free Xmas Stockings!
We dare you to find a more stuffable stocking! This limited-edition DiscoLab creation features a luxuriously soft cuff made of pure Vagisoft — so soft, it makes Santa’s beard feel like a nest of briars and steel wool.
Best of all, you can get one for free when you order at least $50 of other stuff! (Details here.) Or, feel free to order as many as you like for just $20 a pop.
Our ‘B The Bag’ Challenge
Fame is fleeting — unless your photo happens to appear on our shipping bags. Imagine the thrill of knowing that other Betabrand customers are ripping your portrait asunder to get to their new clothes!
That’s right: Beginning in January, one lucky fan’s image will grace 1,000 Betabrand shipping bags. To be automatically entered in the contest, just upload your funniest photo with our Model Citizen app, and then slap on some virtual B-Glasses. (Never created a B-Glasses image before? Go here, click on the Upload Now button below “New To Betabrand,” and follow the simple instructions.) Contest submissions will be accepted through Monday, December 3; we’ll announce the winner on Tuesday.
For inspiration, check out some of our favorite B-Glasses photos on the Model Citizen Wall of Fame. And don’t forget, when you upload a B-Glasses photo, you’ll instantly receive a 10% discount code!
Saturday Sample Sale!
San Franciscans: Please join us tomorrow (Dec. 1) as we briefly leave the cozy confines of the Internet to participate in the Dogpatch Warehouse Sale, along with a bunch of other fine local businesses. We’ll have a tent set up with samples, limited editions, and other rare Betabrand goodies — all at fantastic prices. There will also be Model Citizen magic and mischief, and a very special Disco dressing room. Click here for more info — or here, if you’re Facebook-less.
In Case You Missed ‘Em
- Striped Cashmere Beanies: Time to cradle your cranium in luxuriously soft cashmere.
- Strongman Henleys: In days of old when men were bold … they wore shirts that looked like this.
- World’s Most Nauseating Holiday Pants: Trousers so utterly revolting, we could only make a small batch before our conscience got the best of us. At last, the ugly Christmas sweater has met its match.
- World’s Most Nauseating Holiday Apron: Equally vile in design, but ultimately even more retch-inducing because it involves food preparation.
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