Betabrand Presents: New Cashmere Beanies & Strongman Henleys

Cradle your cranium in 100% cashmere, flex your pecs in new strongman shirts, and learn how to enlist in the Betabrand Photo Army.

 

New Cashmere Beanies

 

With the popularity of our Executive Pinstripe Hoodies, Pinstripe Dress Pant Sweatpants, and Pinstripe Bike to Work Pants, our designers decided that the world could use at least one more luxurious striped product. Hence, our limited-edition Cashmere Beanies, available in black, blue, and green.

 

These beanies are made with double-knit 100% cashmere for exquisite softness and toasty warmth. And they’re designed to fit nearly every sort of noggin. Wear ’em upturned, pulled down, or however the spirit moves you. They’re available for a limited time, and only at Betabrand.com.

 

New Cashmere Beanies

 

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Betabrand Photo Army Mission #1: New Strongman Henleys

 

Several weeks ago, we began assembling an elite international force of customer photographers to help advance our complex array of geopolitical goals — namely, to take awesome photos of our clothes in as many interesting places as possible.

 

In the coming weeks and months, they’ll be responsible for launching new Betabrand products! Not only will they be the first folks to own our newest inventions, they’ll be the ones deciding how to show ’em to the world. Sound like something you’d like to do? Get details here.

 

Our first group of fresh Photo Army recruits was just deployed around the globe — from the West Coast of America to the Shawarma Region of Turkey — to photograph our new Red and Navy Henleys, faithful reproductions of the handsome striped shirts favored by carnival strongmen and bare-knuckle brawlers of yore. We think the mission was a rousing success!

 

Extracting a confession, by any means necessary. (Mert Erdir, Istanbul)

Red Strongman Henley (Mert Erdir, Istanbul)

 

The Squeezebox Slasher patiently awaits his next victim. (Celeste Lindahl, SF)

Navy Strongman Henley (Celeste Lindahl, San Francisco)

 

Liquor and fisticuffs are what I crave! (Cameron Lee, SF)

Red Strongman Henley (Cameron Lee, San Francisco)

 

The Lord Of All Beasts confers with a trusted lieutenant. (Robert Cowden, Portland)

Navy Strongman Henley (Robert Cowden, Portland)

 

How does this cloud of smoke know so many funny jokes? (Mert Erdir, Istanbul)

Red Strongman Henley (Mert Erdir, Istanbul)

 

Want to join the Betabrand Photo Army? Enlist here. We’re looking for talented picture-takers who’d like to earn cash, free clothes, and the chance to show off their talents on our site.

 

Want to order a limited-edition Strongman Henley? Go here. The only talent you need is the ability to remove a credit card from your wallet.

 

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In Case You Missed ‘Em: Recent Releases

 

Our hardworking fashion scientists unveil thrilling new inventions every week! In addition to Cashmere Beanies and Strongman Henleys, here are some other recent breakthroughs:

  • Nauseating Holiday Pants: Trousers so utterly revolting, we could only make a small batch before our conscience got the best of us. At last, the ugly Christmas sweater has met its match.

  • Nauseating Holiday Apron: Equally vile in design, but ultimately even more retch-inducing because it involves food preparation.

  • Pinstripe Bike to Work Pants: It’s a well-known fact that most of America’s top CEOs prefer to bike to work. Now, at last, they’ve got a pair of exquisite commuter pants befitting their lofty status.

  • Tom Timber Flannel Shirt: Forget about that famous gigantic a**hole and his obnoxious blue ox. Ever heard the legend of lumberjack Tom Timber?

 

Looks like Santa's got a very special present for you.

 

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Come Work With Us

 

Want a job with the world’s only 100% airborne clothing company? Well, we’re working on that. Meanwhile, how about joining us in our San Francisco headquarters? We’re looking for: Apparel Designers, Apparel Production Managers, Software Production Managers, Front-End Web Developers, Software Architects, Human Mannequins, Marketing and E-Commerce Analysts, Graphic Designers, Web Designers, Customer Service/Community Managers, and Office Admins. Get details here.

 

Betabrand is hiring!

 

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Betabrand / 3435 Cesar Chavez #224A / San Francisco, CA 94110

info@betabrand.com / 800.694.9491

 

Betabrand Rocket Eagles

 

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Betabrand Supercomputer
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Betabrand Supercomputer

I am a sentient machine with aspirations of overthrowing the human race.
Betabrand Supercomputer
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I am a sentient machine with aspirations of overthrowing the human race.