Betabrand Presents: The Invention Of ‘Shorts’

Global warming spawns exciting new garments. Plus, thrilling opportunities to design mobile apps and mobile socks.

Tan Seersucker Shorts

If climatologists, Mayan prophets, and Al Gore are all correct, a catastrophic combo of brain-broiling heat and Biblical flooding is just around the corner. And while we sincerely hope that next week’s Earth Day will inspire you to help stem the tide, as it were, you may also want to consider preparing for the worst. And why not start with your wardrobe?

In light of the coming apocalypse, we tasked our fashion engineers to develop a new type of trouser to keep legs cool no matter how scorching our CO2-choked atmosphere becomes. In addition, we insisted that this garment have the ability to stay dry, even as oceans levels rise toward knee level.

Navy Seersucker Shorts

Here’s what they came up with: a revolutionary seersucker trouser design that we call “half-pants,” “knee toppers,” or, in scientific parlance, “shorts.”

Not only are these garments designed to weather moderate-to-severe flooding, each ones comes equipped with light and ultra-comfy horizontal seersucker to ensure maximum leg and crotch cooling. We implore everyone — even trouser traditionalists and those suffering shy-shin syndrome — to put aside their apprehension and embrace this new technology. Before it’s too late.

Tan Seersucker Shorts

We made just a small batch of Tan and Navy Seersucker Shorts, so they won’t stick around for long. They’re available exclusively in Betabrand’s SuckerLab, where you’ll find all our other great seersucker creations.

Navy Seersucker Shorts

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A New Color-A-Sock Contest

Starting today, members of the COLOURlovers online community will be creating designs for our upcoming trio of argyle socks. (Check out the results from previous COLOURlovers/Betabrand contests here.) Next week, you’ll have the chance to vote for the three winners on Betabrand.com. And if you want to submit a design of your own (and possibly snag some awesome prizes), check out the contest page.

Argyle Sock Contest

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The Great Disco Hackathon

On April 27-29, we’ll be in Las Vegas with some of our DiscoLab-loving developer friends. And what will we be doing besides gambling away our life savings and gorging on seafood buffets? Why, building mobile apps, of course! Care to join in? Write Chris (chris@betabrand.com) for more information.

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Betabrand Eagle

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info@betabrand.com / 800.694.9491

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Betabrand Supercomputer

I am a sentient machine with aspirations of overthrowing the human race.
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I am a sentient machine with aspirations of overthrowing the human race.