Ever heard of the island of Bawaii?
No? That's not surprising. This poor little chunk of rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean is, quite possibly, the most woebegone nation on Earth. What else can you say about an island whose chief export is molten lava? An island known to other Polynesian cultures as "Isle of Infinite Sorrows" and also "Place Where the Poisonous, Bloodthirsty Monkeys Dwell."
For centuries, Bawaiians had at least one thing they could be proud of: legendarily colorful, comfortable shirts. But then warriors from the neighboring Hawaiian Islands rowed ashore one night and stole all those shirts, leaving the inhabitants of Bawaii worse off than ever. To add insult to injury, the so-called "Hawaiian Shirt" soon grew famous around the world, while the increasingly desperate Bawaiians were forced to wear Styrofoam coolers that had washed up on the beach.
Now, Betabrand is working to correct this historical injustice with a beautiful, limited-edition men's shirt in the classic Bawaiian style. It's lightweight, super-comfortable, and features a flora print that recalls Bawaii's lush past — before it was denuded by crazed wild pigs, high on volcanic fumes.
How bleak are things in Bawaii? Its official currency is the crab nipple.
Help us rekindle the dim flame of Bawaiian national pride by proudly wearing a genuine Bawaiian Shirt. (Note: they're not 100% genuine; we had to make them in San Francisco, because no one in Bawaii remembers how to sew.) We made a very limited number, so order yours today.