When you slip on a pair of soft and supple seersucker Karate Casuals, rest assured you won't find any bothersome buttons, zippers, or other contrivances to complicate your pant-wearing experience. Just cinch ‘em with the built-in drawstring belt and you're ready to practice nonjitsu, Betabrand's martial art of inactivity.

Whatever feats of couch-based derring-do you plan to perform, know that your new trousers have earned the blessing of the Indomitable Dragon Counsel, supreme judicial body for the world of martial arts — convened once a year in a owl-shaped fortress atop Antarctica's tallest, most invisible mountain.