If there's anything else you want to know about this product, please contact us.
Disco Pants with
Red Cotton-Poly Liner
HOW DO THEY FIT?
Straight legged, relaxed fit. Not baggy.
HOW ARE THEY SIZED?
Disco Pants run a bit on the loose side. If you’re between sizes, choose the smaller one.
WHAT IF MY INSEAM IS 30″ OR 34″?
We’re a small business, so we offer only a couple of lengths right now. Fortunately, any tailor can hem our pants to a great fit.
HOW DO I CARE FOR THEM?
Like the finest disco balls, these pants should be treated with utmost care. Hand-wash and line dry only.
We certify that every pair of Disco Pants is made from 100% pure disconium — the rarest, shiniest substance in the known universe.
Don't be fooled by synthetic knockoffs made from cubic disconium. And stay clear of clothiers who insist that Disconite™ Pants are equally lustrous. Sure, they sparkle, but they also smell like rotten octopus.
Why are Disco Pants so special? Because genuine disconium ore is found in only one place on Earth: an icy subterranean cavern deep beneath the most remote corner of Antarctica. While we can't divulge details of our mining operation, rest assured that the thousands of Emperor Penguins in our employ are well-fed and receive regular bathroom and cigarette breaks. Here's some more important information: